Sex can be liberating, mind-blowing, stress-reducing, soul-moving, or just plain fun. This much we know. And while we’re all for “spicing up your love life,” as the magazines like to call it, we’re pretty sure it’s not rocket science to do so — and certainly doesn’t require a new story every single month about it (we’re looking at you, Cosmo). So here it is, the definitive — and only — cheat sheet we’ll ever give you for mixing things up in the bedroom. And since we freely admit that this is hardly brain surgery, little, if any, explanation will be provided. Simply pick the ones you like, ignore the rest, and have a great time:
1. Spanking. Biting and hair-pulling also options. And, hey, be careful out there.
2. Sex toys. We hope we’re far past a time when any guy would be intimidated by the introduction of a vibrator, and certainly there are other options as well.
3. Tying up. Many, many modern young women are into this, and we could spend days analyzing that fact. But trust us, it’s fun. Lots of guys like to be tied up, too.
4. Various forms of anal play. Might be good to discuss this first, as romantically as possible, of course. It’s definitely a love-hate kinda thing.
5. Role-playing.
6. Telling each other what you want, in the moment, and doing it, in the moment.
7. Lingerie, etc. Some guys are into it, some don’t care that much, few will complain, and you might feel super-sexy, so try at will.
8. Do it somewhere other than the bedroom.
9. Share a hot memory from your past. Your shared past, to be clear. Probably you should keep the fantasies about exes to yourself.
10. Shower sex! But be sure it’s the right time. You don’t want to sneak in on him doing … whatever he might take care of in the bathroom when he doesn’t think you’re around.
11. Share a fantasy.
12. Sexting! So scandalous for teens, so awesome for grownups who trust each other implicitly.
13. Masturbation. With or without him there.
Great post! It’s all in good fun!
Great list – all good ideas. One caveat – women like these things, too. It’s not just hetero sex.
Good to know! Being straight women, we do not know these things, so always feel free to tell us.
Hey Jennifer, there is a happy medium to be reached here maybe not every month, but you know guys have a short attention span and maybe some women need a remind once in the while. So couldn’t it be a work in progress? maybe updated once a year as needed? Oh I would have put oral skills first! no as in talking to one another about your needs on a regular basis, and sometimes romance? sometimes closer,(NIN) you know about the different rooms of sex? newly wed sex in any room, then after a few years bedroom sex. you’re no longer doing it all over the house, then hallway sex, where you say fuck you as you pass on the way to the bathroom. and lastly courtroom sex where the one with the most going into the marriage gets screwed? maybe I should share this on a different post. I get carried away some, :-p but I mean well. oh and question you get my humor i hope. I’m really almost normal in person. I just get wild online sometimes, I’m kinda shy most of the time. I am the guy who always had a camera taking pictures, all through your school years. You know the ones I mean, only not creepy. Friendly the guy you wanted to take your picture because you trusted them to not make you look silly or bad? you know want i mean? I hope so, hey and how do i know you’re the sexy feminist? what makes you sexy? and who says so? I want names and details! or i’m not believing it. of course that’s easy for me to say. I hope you don’t mind me rambling on your pages. I promise to have some relevant sp? comments on point once in a blue moon or full moon or sailor moon. isn’t she just the baddest? I’m enjoying your site, (in case you were wondering) although there are a few things I wish were different. more on that later after i know you don’t hate me
you’re not a hater are you? well guess you deserve a break today so i’ll leave you with this wish from me to you. “May the happiest days of you past, be the saddest days of you future.” I hope you are successful in what you hope and dream to accomplish with your sexy feminist. Live long and prosper! oh I wrote this to Jennifer, because I couldn’t find a way to send you message any other way. ps I was so looking forward to reading the about section. what’s up with that? talk about your big let down, it was a disappointment to say the least. Hopefully some time in the future you’ll complete that section? Think of it as your mission statement? Your hello world 
page? your profile page? You shouldn’t be an unknown, should you? oh well, by now you either get it or not, I surrender, you win, there’s just no talking to you when you get like this! I’ll come back when you’re in a more talkative mood. really conversation is a two way street, you should at least give me a chance, I mean how can I know what you mean if you won’t open up? come on tell me how you really feel, is that all you’ve got to say for yourself? ok then, I’m leaving I can take a hint, you don’t have to rub my nose in it. hmmm or maybe that’s your whole point. Let me think about it and get back to you. ok?
Seriously about Cosmo. All their advice is the same and not very good. Here’s a funny video about it- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OTQnUTgLssI
I’m all for the “women have choices in sex and just cause they might like to be dominated in bed does not mean they can’t be feminists” thing, but I find it upsetting that I’m one of the few women these days that does NOT like to be spanked or degraded in bed in any way. I like sex to be egalitarian. Am I alone in this? Am I the only woman who’s vagina dries up at the thought of being spanked or humiliated? Please tell me I’m not alone.
Britt;
Just pank him back; tie him up and have your way with him…That’s EQUALITY! (But mostly pure pleasure!)
Humiliation is subjective. What’s degrading to you might not be to someone else. But wanting to feel humiliated during sex is not psychologically healthy; it’s generally due to an internalization of shame. Don’t feel tempted by society telling you should be a certain way, it’s definitely influenced by mainstream porn where men have admitted on the internet that they watch degrading porn because they either hate women or want a sort of revenge.
And you’re not the only one, lots of women try it but end up feeling dissatisfied.